[thought process]
colorado’s dry heat vaguely reminds me of walking through joshua tree,
mind blown and burnt out on vegas… almost two years ago… when all of this started
smoked a cigarette in the shower today.
one of many things i have crossed of the list since then….
the shower filled with smoke like a thick fog before dawn in upstate new york
the smoke got in my eyes… except for real this time
too drunk to figure out what to do with a half smoked, soggy cigarette…
the tall can of pbr was an easy choice when i had to face this exact situation
on a west philadelphia rooftop in the pouring rain on the fourth of july
not to be confused with the previous year; tequila on the roof in santa ana
i elected to mash the cigarette into the tiles on the shower floor,
rubbed the black smudge away with my foot, threw the butt on the floor.
i love how ashes just disappear, but where do they go?
i have one of those open, stand up showers with a brand new glass wall
brand new because i fell through it some amount of weeks ago…
the hangover ended three days after they sewed me back together
either way, i wasn’t going to put the cigarette out in my beer
i hadn’t finished it yet.
i first learned how enjoyable a beer in the shower is
after wandering around hollywood blvd until sunrise
it takes a clever imagination for me to relax enough for sleep.
the nights here are still cold
i like to be warm when i’m cold.
i’ve decided against ever spending another five month winter, frozen and awake in the northeast,
but i wont be able to escape the stifling tension of summer
the heat carries a dense contamination of exhausted pleasure.
you get used to the odor of wasted time and decay if you stick around long enough,
but you will always taste the staleness in the air… it’s like breathing cement
time passes even slower as you travel west.
but it only works if you stop to notice….
if you keep moving, it can hardly catch up…
- posted by angela @ 4:26 PM